Ryu's letter to Capcom
by Mr. Crimson
Summary: Rated for language, though edited anyway. I don't own any of the games/characters mentioned, and please no flames. I know it's crap ^_^


To whom it may concern,  
  
Hello, this is Ryu Sakai. Y'know, the reasons why half of you guys still have a job? Anyway, I needed to address something that I, and many of my other peers, feel passionately about.   
  
For the longest time, we've been battling each other in many ways, either it be with our allies and traducers at Marvel, or even other organizations that we've aligned ourselves with, even if for a brief period. But aside from the crossovers, we have the Street Fighter series, which was handled...well, your writers suck ass, there, I said it. There are more complaints to come, so I hope you're taking much needed time to read this.  
  
For example, since Street Fighter Alpha 2, my colleagues and I discussed the status of how Charlie (or Nash, depending) managed to live after being pushed off a cliff? He questioned it himself, but apparently it was answered later in Marvel versus Street Fighter, as there was a shadow/cyber version of him. Sadly, we learned that after all this time, it was only an enhanced (yet experimental) version of the G-Virus from your other series, Resident Evil. It was the only reason why my fiancée Jill Valentine was in Marvel vs. Capcom 2, to hunt down the remaining evidence of the horrid disease. She decided not to go after Zangief, since he had an interesting control of his infection (i.e., the "Iron Man" mode he was in). As for me? Well, how the hell else could I transform into my best friend and worse enemy? Please guys, get this together before Dan turns out to be Shen Long or something.  
  
Second, and I know I'm not alone here, Gill. I'm not talking about the body part of a fish or a monetary unit in a foreign country. I'm talking about the two-colored, Panteen Pro-V f*cker that's haunted us all since Street Fighter 3! I mean, he'd be the greatest challenge, but RESSUERCTION? Who's idea was it to f*ck with us like that? I'm sorry guys, but for one that wants a viable challenge, Gill was a little much. Especially since his costume (or lack thereof) was about to resort the lot of us towards homosexuality...not that there's anything wrong with that.   
  
Finally, certain things on the versus games. All of the ones involving Marvel reps were good, but aside from Akuma, the final bosses were nothing more than Marvel villains with over-the-top stuff added! Okay, Apocalypse can grow to building code violation sizes, and I know not a damn thing about Abyss, but how about Sigma? Or, what happened to that baby in Darkstalkers 3? You know the one, Jedah's stage, the "Fetus of God", vomit festival? Things that looked so important, cool, or in that baby's case just wrong, are forgotten by you guys. Come on, just because there's no popular demand for the little things, doesn't mean that the consumers, the guys responsible for our paychecks, are to be denied of what they really are!! Then again, there'd be little fan fiction for people to write, so in a way, never mind.  
  
My second thing on vs. games involves clothing. It wasn't until we faced off with the SNK guys that our clothing designs are...ass. Look at them, they dress as if they came off a Paris runway, or just got their orders from HotTopic.com. Then look at us. We look as if we just robbed a Salvation Army and hope we don't sweat too much, so there's no need to wash our only pair of clothes. Sure, Chun Li dodged that by savings and wise investment from her Interpol job, but why couldn't you hook us up? We care about the Dow Jones Industrial Average, too! And look at Remy! He looks like SNK material, whereas we're still screwed to look like extras in Black Hawk Down!   
  
Finally, we have a few requests on a roster for MVC 3. We've been looking at people such as Dante from Devil May Cry, Super Joe from Bionic Commando (Sonson and Morrigan were crushed when that rumor of him being a secret character proved false. You never wanna' see them pissed, especially "Sonny".), and even RE 3's Nemesis! Others we've voted on were Zero of Mega Man X fame, Kyoko and Kyosuke (he showed promise in CVS 2) from Rival Schools, Rei from Breath of Fire 3, and ANYONE from Onimusha!   
  
Well, I'm hoping this letter wasn't too harsh, but if so, then you know how strongly we feel about these matters addressed in this letter. So if our demands are not met between now and summer of 2002, there will be reckoning from where there will be no waking for the oppressors. Thank you for your cooperation, and we hope you do the smart thing.   
Signed,   
Ryu Sakai, representing all Capcom reps and what-have-you. 


End file.
